How to Talk to Your Loved Ones About Estate Planning

3 Ways to Begin This Important Conversation

Estate planning is necessary at any age. If you are over 18 and have anything that may be a blessing (your furniture or your jewelry collection) or a burden (your pet snake or your financed car) to your loved ones if you were gone, then you need a Will. But explaining this truth can be difficult.

The easiest way to open the dialogue with your loved ones about estate planning is by sharing your own experience. Once you have taken the time to plan your affairs, then you can better share with your loved ones the peace of mind that you have since you handled your estate planning. You can also explain how easy the process is once you have finished it. Tell your loved one that you will talk through the process with them. Offer to go with your loved one to see an estate planning attorney or to attend an estate planning seminar and literally hold your loved one’s hand as they go through the entire process.

If you do not already have a Will, then you can suggest that you and your loved one secure your Wills together. Sometimes it is easier to accomplish a daunting task when we do it with someone we love.

1. Be patient, yet persistent

Talking about estate planning is difficult. Remember that it’s important to exercise patience and persistence when speaking with your loved ones. Do not get upset if they do not see the importance or urgency of estate planning the first time that you mention it. Just continue to mention estate planning periodically when the opportunity presents itself.

Mention a celebrity or a relative or friend who failed to plan their affairs and the consequences of not having done so.

Share an article with them about the strategies for estate planning.

Find a social media site or post that illuminates the importance of planning one’s affairs. Use your own family scenarios to introduce the conversation.

In other words, just continue to share information periodically and patiently about estates and tips for estate planning to your loved one.

2. Find Out What is Important to Them

What do you know about the person with whom you are communicating about estate planning? Use your personal knowledge about them as a starting point for the estate planning conversation.

Do they have a special or unique collection (books, memorabilia, jewelry, etc.) that they would not want sold or thrown away?

What do they care about the most that will make them finally decide to move forward with estate planning?

3. Speak in a Positive Way

Estate planning is about preserving one’s assets and planning for the future. Everyone has or should have a retirement plan, life insurance and an estate plan. By completing an estate plan, we ensure that everything we have worked hard to accomplish does not disappear when we pass away. This doesn't have to mean an expansive piece of land, a house, or money. Let your loved one know that you care what happens to their watch collection, the family photo albums, the tea set, the military medals, the furniture (and we know vintage is is always in style). This is how we take care of everything that matters to us in life, and make sure families carry on legacy, heirlooms, and memories.

Ask your loved ones, Don’t they want to share their favorite piece of artwork with their favorite niece? Don’t they want to leave their classic car to their brother who worked on the car with them? Don't they want their engagement ring to be passed on to the next generation?

Estate planning is all about protecting one’s assets, and speaking positively about this will help your loved ones to get started with the process.